My new love

Okay. The deed is done and I am now a proud owner of Bold 2. *Whooops!*

I’m sorry guys for not updating as often as I should. I’ve been really active on my twitter (as always) instead.. So follow me to get live updates from me!!

Painted the town red yesterday with Alex, Yanru, & Terence at Dbl O. Haven’t partied for a while and I am glad to have put on my dancing shoes. It’s getting a little stifling where I am.

I am exhausted. Thank goodness for 2 days of spa pampering to soothe tired muscles and strained emotional well-being. I think I will continue the stream of euphoria by indulging in retail therapy tomorrow…

I really need a break. An extended one at that.

Goodbye 2009, Hello 2010!

First entry of 2010! I’m not gonna make resolutions cos I hardly ever keep them..

So in 2009, I’ve learnt

• Not to bother too much about tarnished nails so long as I can’t tell they are tarnished from far.
• Super shiny top coats and fast drying top coats (talking about nails duh duh duh) are the answers to beautiful nails.
• Big huge corporations have big huge idiots sitting at the top with big huge goals and no big huge ideas how to attain them.
• Certain problems are not that easily settled by replacing the number of losses, because you simply take away the quality.
• That one cannot be expected to give first class end product when being compensated peanuts.

It had been a year where, despite all the constant exposure to the ugly side of people, I actually found the love of my life. : )

Here I am with shaking faith, praying subtly for the betterment of this brand new year. And here I am, stronger than previous years, subjecting to growing up and learning to correct thousands of yesterdays’ moments of follies.

Looking forward to some of the events planned sporadically across the new calendar year. Laughter and booze galore.

Happy Twenty 10 everybarddy! : )

 

Merry Kissmas all !

Hope you’ve been good this year. Xoxo.

Thankful for the little things

Things are slowly falling into place, and hoping that it works out a lot better with this arrangement..

 

 

 

 

 

Somewhere along the lines towards the abyss, awaiting a stopover is the resignation. The colours of your clothes and the moods you undergo take on a larger scale in variety. My days still themselves with prideful steadiness and reminders of a better today than a yesterday, yet contentment seems to be a troubled friend.

My words are escaping by me. I am nearly incoherent but am still busy catching muse that still subsists with the woman I have become. Time doesn’t recover youth as youth doesn’t recover with time; no more time shall be crashed and burned in the excuse of jadedness. Forces of uncontrollable nature let happen, all in good time and good reason. Reasons have limits, but when do I admit to my bursting point? If selfishness was indeed what molded the frame that lives of me this day, pain wouldn’t dominate it has been and regret would be family. There is nothing that deserves my regret in this designated familiar scene. Regret is an awful word and I clasp my palms together to think less of it to be able to stop mentioning it.

New faces familiarize themselves within my head but it’s a long journey being of friendly comfort towards the heart. My map of indites seem to be disintegrated into repetition of slurs that does not piece up any part of the puzzle.

Tonight, I will rest upon my bed and end my night not being mad at you. Anger has introduced a new wave of fatigue that perpetually bubbles within and it is time to jerk it to a permanent halt. I will cease the blaming and take it upon indifference and alas, indifference will be my last standing emotion felt towards you. Someday, recollections of these moments of reluctance and dilemma would all just draw a picture of a bad dream that lasted while it did.

You have been my pinch of salt. Regardless of what harm you have done than good by choice and intention, thank you for the good days and the memories. The collective term “us” has reduced to an individualistic label of you or me, and I don’t do regret. Take care, one I loved once ever dearly.

 

When lost love embarks on an overhaul, it becomes the bane of existence of memories and its survival. I am not God and shouldn’t have placed belief in its places of displacement that there was sufficient storage for more without physical evidence. Reasons, they become the accomplices that we all exploit to relief our impulses of rage every once in a common moon. So memories, they hold me back no further.

So hopefully, it will be a worthwhile toast amidst the curse of flu and all the mending that needs patch works, to singlehood and more meaningful functions of a break up. Bury the hatchets and bid goodbye the yesterdays.

Life resumes, the way the systems have always been running. The stupidity of it all to believe that I would stay safe in your arms forever.

I’m still breathing

I leave the gas on
Walk the alleys in the dark
Sleep with candles burning
I leave the door unlocked
I’m weaving a rope and
Running all the red lights
Did I get your attention
‘Cause I’m sending all the signs that

The clock is ticking
And I’ll be giving my two weeks
Pick your favorite shade of black
You’d best prepare a speech
Say something funny
Say something sweet
But don’t say that you loved me

I’m still breathing
But we’ve been dead for a while
This sickness has no cure
We’re going down for sure
Already lost our grip
Best abandon ship…

Maybe I was too pale
Maybe I was too fat
Maybe you had better
Better luck in the sack
No formal education
And I swore way too much
I swear you didn’t care
‘Cause we were in love

So as I write this letter
And shed my last tear
Know it’s all for the better
That we end this here
Let’s close this chapter
Say one last prayer
But don’t say that you loved me

I’m still breathing
But we’ve been dead for a while
This sickness has no cure
We’re going down for sure
Oh we’ve been diagnosed
So let’s give up the ghost
‘Cause I’m still breathing
But we’ve been dead for a while
This sickness has no cure
We’re going down for sure
Already lost our grip
Best abandon ship

 

Such a tragic December song. It’s been on repeat, wherever I go, whenever I’m alone. So painfully beautiful.

It’s so much easier to twit than blog

Ever since I started twittering, it’s always been hard for me to get my blogging mojo back. I like to talk about things that are happening real time as opposed to relating it the day after. So with the convenience of my berry, I twit almost everywhere anywhere. Teehee.

Looks like the sidebar’s gonna see more action.

My laziness the past few days is rendering my spending ability down to zilch. Which is good too, in a way, because it forces me to purge my wardrobe, to see what I do not wear any more, and to figure out new combination which work.

Never the fashionista, but am blessed with a boy who doesn’t really tire of my predictability. I hope.

A quick look into my shoe case only goes to prove that impulse buying is any girl’s bane. I have maybe close to 20 pairs of shoes but merely wear 5 pairs regularly. I probably should give those that I don’t wear anymore to the Salvation Army?

The gist is, however, once the money is spent, even if I refuse to wear the shoes, it kinda seem to make my money’s worth by keeping them for a while. Until they wheedle their way into my fancy again, or simply crumble on my feet.

Sounds like I am quite a wasteful person. And with New Year around the corner, maybe the resolutions shall be as follows:

1) Make smarter and informed purchases
2) Get that driving license already dammit!
3) Whip that bloody swing into shape.

And.. a start a new chapter of my life

I love you so much, and sometimes I wish you could love me exactly the way I do you, so that you would understand why it hurts so persistently having to be anonymously misjudged by the people that matter to you.

I’ve always been brilliant with words, words to make something simple turn into jargons of magic. But for once in my life, I’m actually brilliant with my actions. It’s impressively a good thing, and I hope you do realise that you are, in fact, the most special person I’ve ever come across and loved.

2010 is arriving in bits and fragments of time. Portions of 2010 are already pathed out for me and being human, I am afraid of sorrow, which will definitely come my way. Come 2010, I’ll soon be turning 21 and I hope we see the 21st year of our lives together.